The New Dad’s Guide to Celebrating His Wife on Her First Mother’s Day | Parenting | Blog | Better Marriages | Educating Couples - Building Relationships

The New Dad’s Guide to Celebrating His Wife on Her First Mother’s Day

by Amanda Richter

You have your Mother’s Day routine down pat: over the last few decades you’ve learned what your mom does and doesn’t like to receive as gifts. But this year is different. The addition of your baby has made your own wife a mother, and since baby won’t have any understanding of this holiday for years to come, it’s up to you to make sure your wife knows that you appreciate all she does in nurturing and caring for the baby, and is pampered accordingly. Here are some things to remember as you approach your wife’s first Mother’s Day:

She’s Your Wife, Not Your Mom

Even though they’re both women who love you, it’s key to remember that they are not one-and-the-same, nor is their relationship with you. It’s essential for you, as a husband, to acknowledge your wife’s role in caring for and raising your child. She spent nine months losing her figure, countless hours in labor and delivery and is probably up multiple times a night for feedings and changing. If you envisioned just doubling up your typical Mother’s Day purchases this year, heed this advice and don’t do it or risk getting put on diaper duty 24/7 until your sweet babe is out of diapers.

Listen for Clues

Remember that year when Dad gave Mom a new ironing board for Mother’s Day? While you might not have noticed, Dad was definitely in the proverbial dog house. As the holiday draws closer, pay attention to little hints that your wife drops. Usually these are thinly veiled references to things she’d like to have, and they’re never household appliances or anything that would be used for cleaning up the home. She may rave about the new yoga mat that her instructor has or say how much she’d love to have all of the baby’s photos in an album. This is your chance to show that you understand her; call up her best bud who’s in the same class so you can find out how to obtain the right yoga mat, or create an account at Snapfish or Shutterfly, upload photos and create a customized photo book.

Make it Beautiful

A nice big bouquet of flowers is always a great gift, and can be used as a center piece on the table for the dinner you cook, or as a delivery vessel of a handwritten card and gift certificate to a day at the spa or as part of a gift set from FTD. Remember the romance of your early dating days? Your wife is still that beautiful girl you fell in love with, so show her your sweet side and woo her with some romance this Mother’s Day.

Consider the Budget

According to a Wall Street Journal blog, in 2013 Americans planned to spend about $169 on Mother’s Day gifts. Giving a thoughtful gift instead of an overly expensive one will keep you from breaking the bank. That being said, there’s nothing worse than splurging on your wife only to have her in a rage because you blew the budget. If money’s tight this year, consider taking the baby out to the park while your wife gets to enjoy at afternoon at home including in the spa-like treatments that you’ve prepared. Parents suggests having aromatic candles, massage oil and lotions on hand for the ultimate spa experience. You could also do this once Baby’s down for the night and pamper her with a massage and an at-home date night.